Death Juice

I started this process with the intent to share my life experiences and vast knowledge of obscure documentaries (including, but not limited to, Forgiving Dr. Mengele) with the friends and family members who had suggested I start a blog. As I gave thought to the content and, of course, the direction I wanted to take the blog, I figured it best to check out other friends blogs. After I talked myself back in off the ledge--yes, some of them really were THAT bad--I decided I had to try to incorporate some of the more popular aspects of the traditional blog. First of all, I need to let you know every time my child does something even the slightest bit interesting-not necessarily interesting to YOU--but interesting to say, me or their grandma or some person who has been in a catatonic state on a deserted island for many years listening exclusively to Milli Vanilli. Secondly, I must include how happy I am with some ridiculously boring aspect my life, to which everyone reading it will need to re-evaluate what is wrong with THEM that they don't get that much pleasure out of scrubbing the built up dust and grease concoction off the top of the kitchen cabinets. But most importantly, I must include a recipe--one of my favorites--one that will make all of my friends green with envy. So here it is, the one that will have everybody asking "how does she find the time to make something so complex?"

DEATH JUICE*
1 battery
2 eggs (make sure they are rotten)
1 pee
1 poo
1 dandy lion
1 milk (from a milkweed)

And VOILA! It's just that simple. The off gas alone is sure to kill even the most stubborn pests. (I am assuming it was intended to be used on his younger brother)

*Recipe donated by my 10 year old son. Of course the donation was submitted involuntarily, by me, after I found it in his back pack. I asked Brady " Son, when did you have time to come up with such an elaborate concoction?" He said "In class of course". Ahhh, the joys of public education. I want to publicly thank Brady for his submission. Also, I want to thank George and Barbara Bush for their "No Child Left Behind" act--good thing cause who knows what the hell they'd be making if they were left unattended anymore then they are now.